Abstention

Abstention 

By: Jessica Chase

The tension pushes, pulls, tugs in my core.

Breathe, meditate, calm this tension with anxiety, with love.

What lessons is the universe trying to teach me?

Testing my sense of self.

Testing my loyalty to light.

Words fly from every direction like an intersection.

Green light - positive thoughts, words of encouragement.

Red light - gossip, betrayal.

Stop. Listen. Learn.

Refrain from participation or contribution to the negativity.

Who am I?

Who do I want to be?

Breathe in, breathe out. 

Growth, forgiveness, healing.

An endless cycle of a soul seeking enlightenment. 

Actions speak louder than words. 

Some stuff I believe :)

1. I'd rather wear flowers in my hair than diamonds around my neck. 

2. I like the smell of the earth, the touch of the waves, the taste of berries, the sight of trees, the sound of laughter, and the feeling of being alive. 

3. I believe that there is no greater good in all the world than motherhood. The influence of a mother in the lives of her children is beyond calculation. 

4. I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read and all the friends [and family] I want to see. 

5. I believe in "The Secret" and have given the book to many people. "All that we are is a result of what we have thought." - Buddha

6. I am passionate about helping people feel loved, find their passion, be happy. I genuinely want good things for people and am not fake. 

7. I believe that *love* and gratitude are always the answer(s).

8. I think it's important to set long / short term goals and be on a constant path to improve ourselves because if we don't try to improve ourselves ( all of us ) how can we evolve and make this a better place?

Kudos to Pinterest and the Pinners for helping me compile these thoughts. 

Vulnerability, Daring Greatly

I've been watching a lot of Super Soul Sunday lately on the OWN network. For those that know me - you know I'm a big fan Oprah. It's been nice to have such a great show to watch on Sunday's... It's thought provoking, spiritual, uplifting, etc. I highly recommend you all check it out. You can watch the show on Oprah.com too of you don't have cable or satellite. She had an author on her show today called Brene Brown who wrote the book "Daring Greatly" and she has received over 8 million view on TED with her lecture about vulnerability.

The book starts out with this quote that I love:
“It is not the critic who counts, nor the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; Who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”
President Theodore Roosevelt
Speech at the Sorbonne
April 23, 1910

I think vulnerability is a very interesting topic. As Brown says, most people are raised that vulnerability is a weakness, but it's so important to ask for what you need and have those hard conversations. Take the risk of being vulnerable and being yourself. You are beautiful! Show the world your beauty. Let people in. "You can't get to courage without walking through vulnerability. It [vulnerability] is the key to having meaningful relationships and intimacy," said Brown.

Brown also talked about how our culture lives in fear more than ever, and because of this - we are all less vulnerable and don't enjoy "joy" as much as we should. "The number one casualty of a scarcity culture is vulnerability. Get rid of fear. Be open [and vulnerable] enough to take the risk to fail. Let go of what people think."

By doing this and practicing gratitude she said we will all experience joy more deeply. "Don't forebode joy. Push harder into those moments of joy. Be vulnerable enough to enjoy joy. Practice gratitude." She said we cannot experience joy without gratitude and that a way to battle fear is by practicing gratitude. For example, if you are scared your plane will crash, just start being grateful about the fact that you have enough money to be in that plane and going where you are going in the first place.

I really enjoyed the discussion and can't wait to read "Daring Greatly"!

My love affair with art.

I've always been really interested in art since I was a child. It may be that my mother was an artist, or that she encouraged me to participate in imaginative and artsy projects on a frequent basis growing up. I decided to take an art history class in high school because I wanted to learn more about art and because I wanted to get some college credit. It just so happened that one of my best friends ended up in the same class with me.

Mid way through the year our teacher announced that we were taking a trip to San Francisco as a class. I was so excited because I had heard that San Francisco was a really fun place and I think I had even been there once before as a child. I was also excited because we were going to a place that exuded art from every crevice. My friend Kristen and I decided to room together and had a blast goofing off, dancing, and tumbling around the hotel room. We were two 17 year old girls on one of our first trips away from home.

Our first day in San Francisco, I will never forget, we saw the exact replica of the gold Ghiberti doors with 3-D carved biblical scenes across them. I vowed to myself that I would see the original Ghiberti doors in my lifetime. We walked through the doors into a cathedral with beautiful stained glass and analyzed the Byzantine style art.

Later that day after getting hot clam chowder at Fisherman's Warf and "people watching" we went to the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art (MOMA). I will never forget the moment I saw my friend Kristin balling in front of the Rothko #14 Blue & Red piece called "1960" because it moved her so much or the feeling I felt when I saw Frida Kahlo's Self Portraits.

That trip made me solidify a life long love of art and sure enough, in 2011 my husband and I saw the original Ghiberti doors in Florence, Italy. I am also going to be a bridesmaid in Kristin's wedding in May of 2013.

Here is what the Rothko #14 looks like:

Pearl of China Book Review

Pearl of China by Anchee Min

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


It is rare that any of us find a friendship at a young age that lasts a lifetime let alone finding a friend at any age and having that friendship last a lifetime. The friendship that Pearl and Willow shared hit me deep in my core and I am so happy that I got to experience their stories by reading this book. Whether it was love for China, love for each other or love for their faith... This book showed what true love is all about - the characters truly "had known the fullness of love, which was absolute in height and depth." Many of the characters, even though they experienced much hardship, really did feel love on a different level then most people feel. It goes to show - you don't have to be rich or from some elite demographic to experience life's true beauty. In fact, if any of the characters in the book were rich a a young age, you wonder if they would have had such an amazing story to tell.

Isn't it also so true that we learn something new from each person we meet each day? I loved what Willow said about Hsu Chih-mo after he passed, "The most important lesson he taught me was that there was no one singular perspective on things or emotions in the universe-no one way of comprehending the truth." I thought this was such an important quote in this book because there were so many people who were so stuck in believing in their own individual truths at times, but when they truly evolved was when they embraced others truths and let go of their own to learn and become things they never thought possible. For example - if Willow's papa had never joined Absalom in helping with his church and becoming a Christian/Buddhist he would have continued to live a peasant lifestyle and wouldn't have fulfilled his true destiny. I think it is so important to be open to life and things its trying to teach us on a daily basis. How can one learn when being rigid in ones thoughts and beliefs?

There were so many things that happened in this book that made me believe that almost anyone can overcome any obstacle - whether through hard work or through spiritual means. And honestly, it did give me a renewed belief in my faith. I loved the part in the book where the "dead" trees that had been used to build the new church blossomed inside the church - "the green miracle" ha! "With the breeze from the window, the leaves swayed like dancers' sleeves across the room."

I loved so much about this book that it's hard to summarize my thoughts without writing a novel myself. I really enjoyed the poetry that was added within the pages as well - this was my favorite poem from the book-

I lived by the Yangtze River near it's source,
While you reside farther down its course.
You and I drink water from the same stream,
I haven't seen you though daily of you I dream.

When will this river water cease to run?
When shall I not love you, the way I do?
I only wish our two hearts would beat as one,
And you wouldn't disappoint me in my love for you.




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Tradition

One of my favorite family traditions started when I was about 14-years old. My mother was always very diligent about making sure that my siblings and I were respectful of other religions and diversity. Although we were predominantly LDS growing up, she thought that it was important for us to respect others no matter what their religion was. She made it clear that it was important to have spirituality in our lives, but that that didn't necessarily have to fit a mold. As part of this teaching, she would take us to all different kinds of churches every couple of months or so.

One year, on New Years Eve she took us to the Unitarian church for a ceremony. We had been to the Unitarian church before for Sunday service and I enjoyed the band on stage and the congregation holding hands and singing together. On this night, there wasn't a traditional church ceremony going on - this was a special ceremony that only happened on New Year's Eve. Even though I was a teenager I was excited to be experiencing something new and fun with my family.

The people running the ceremony passed out four items: a tissue paper, a pen, a paper and an envelope. They then asked everyone to write down the things they wanted to get rid if from the previous year - what were the things burdening you, bringing you down, preventing you from moving in a forward progression in your life?We all proceeded to write things in the 3x4 inch piece of paper. I wrote things like - "sadness," "negativity," "fear," etc. They then asked us asked us to walk to the front of the room and burn the piece of paper in a large bowl called "The Burning Bowl."

When I walked up to the font of the room there was a large bowl with fire inside of it. I dropped by piece of paper, watched it disintegrate. I suddenly felt a burden release from my shoulders. All of the things I wanted to get rid of from the past year were now in the past. I could let go of them and move on to more positive things. As we walked back to our seats we listened to what was next in the agenda for the ceremony. We were asked to write a letter to God outlining what we wanted to happen for ourselves and those close to us in the coming year on the sheet of paper they gave us. It was basically an opportunity for us to sit back and really focus on what goals we'd like to set for ourselves in the next year. I wrote and wrote and wrote until type page was full on the front and back side.

They then asked us to seal the envelope and give it to them so they cloud pray on it for the next year. At the end of each year, they mail you back the letter so that you caned it on New Year's Eve and see what you have accomplished that year. It's amazing to see what can be accomplished if you just put it out there in the universe. I didn't do the ceremony the next year, or even the year after but a couple years ago I decided to put together a "Burning Bowl" ceremony at my house for my friends and family. It's not as formal or official, but it still helps us release our burdens from the year before and set new goals for the year ahead. It's become a pretty important and meaningful tradition for me and I am grateful to my mother for introducing such a positive experience my life.